Finding a loving, loyal, and all around amazing spouse is one of the most difficult and most rewarding things that any person will ever do in their lifetime. Unfortunately however, there are millions upon millions of people around the world who will make bad decisions regarding spouse selection. These are people who, as a result of poor spouse selection decisions doom themselves to unhappy marriages, divorce, and ultimately a lifetime of bitter loneliness.
Now I’m no expert on this subject, but as somebody who has been down the aisle a couple of times now, I do have a few ideas to share that readers may deem helpful as they set out on their path to find the right partner.
One of the first things that one must keep in mind when you are looking for a husband or wife to share your life with is that this is an entirely different matter than simply finding a boyfriend or girlfriend to keep you busy for a few months or a couple of years while you are still “keeping your options open” and “having fun”.
Indeed, while a short-term dating partner may be chosen on the basis of looks, sexual compatibility, or just the fact that you like to hang out and drink beers together, when selecting a spouse one must consider how the relationship will pan out in the long term.
While sexual compatibility is still an important factor to consider there are three other factors that I haver identified that I feel are equally important to the long term health of any marriage, they are as follows:
1) Commitment to the relationship. So many people these days take marriage lightly. Just look at those bozos in Hollywood, marrying and divorcing each other on a whim, it’s disgusting. So, before you say “I do” be sure to discuss your beliefs about marriage and commitment with your spouse and confirm that they take entering into this sacred union as seriously as you do and that they are willing to stick in there for the long haul, like they say, “in good times and in bad”. In other words, you want your spouse to be on lockdown, because they want to be After all, you don’t want a spouse who starts sharing these warning signs, that would really suck, believe me.
2) Similar ideas on child rearing. If you are still at an age where having children is a physical possibility, then it is important that you and your potential spouse discuss what you both want in regards to starting a family. Needless to say, if you get married and then discover that your partner wants to have ten kids, while you want none, this is guaranteed to cause some relationship trouble.
3) Having compatible “money blueprints”. I got this from T Harv Eker. Basically he says that every person has a blueprint for how they think about and handle money, based on their early life programming and social conditioning. Since finances are statistically one of the biggest sources of conflict in marriages, it is important that you and your potential spouse have similar views on spending, earning, saving and investing.
I would assert that simply by using these three things to guide your spouse selection decision making that you would be better off than 97% of folks who are getting married these days.